Waging the Spiritual Battle- A Journal from the Home Front

Friday night Nov 16th (Jerusalem)- Right after lighting candles I started singing the song Hu Yigal Otanu...which was strange as I usually start to sing the same shabbat niggun every week.  The siren sounded a couple of minutes later....I was with my 3 kids and two other holy women.  We went into the safe room, held hands, davened, and danced.  I felt so much light.  We spoke after that the scence felt like we had just crossed the Yam Suf.  For the rest of Shabbat I felt so much light and protection from Ha Kadosh baruch Hu.  This was in direct contrast to the almost panic attack I had as we were about to take in Shabbat, going on my 2nd full week without my husband here and I could not remember how to set up the plata. The light of Shabbat was a huge matana and strength that I hope I will be able to carry into the week.

Sat Night- Saw the post to learn tehillim 83, which was the same tehillim I had opened up spontaneously when I asked Hashem to show me what tehillim to say.

Sunday- Too much media watching is not helpful to keep a state of emunah strong.  Lets go back to Shabbat!!!  I decided bli neder to start learning more hilchot brachot in addition to daily tehillim for the war.  Less news more Torah!!!!

Monday morning-  Saw a husband in uniform dropping off his daughter in my son's gan.  Out of 8 kids only, there are definitely a few soldiers in the group.  I gave him a bracha and took his name to daven for and then saw the post that Shirat Devora put up about the Shmira Project.  Please Am Yisrael pass this on to as MANY PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE!!!!! This project is crucial http://www.shmiraproject.com/ as we are Am Echad and Lev Echad.  Each ones teshuvah supports the whole nation.  I personally am going to learn hilchot brachot daily bli neder on behalf of the soldiers in my sons gan.

Important Time Imminent: Tehillim 130 to be said in conjunction with mekubalim at the Kever of Rebbi Shimon at 5:00PM Israel time

I just had a recording on my machine from Rav Moshe, a mekubal who works with other Rabbis at the kever of Rebbe Shimon Bar Yochai to support Am Yisrael with personal etzot and tefilot (nightly tikkun Hatzot- for the benefit of all Am Yisrael).  He said that at 5:00 P.M to light a candle and say perek tehillim קל 130. The Rabbis will be davening at the kever that in the zchut of Rebbe Shimon bar Yochai Am Yisrael should come to its speedy redemption and merit to receive Moshiach Tzidkenu. Amen!!!

Tehillim 83 should be said daily during the duration of the War

Thank you Yeranen Yaakov for posting this for us:

Arutz Sheva:

Rabbi Ovadia Yosef has called on Jews to seek divine protection as well as taking safety measures. He declared Friday that worshipers should say Psalm 83 for the safety of Israeli civilians and soldiers after opening the Aron Kodesh, both on the Sabbath and during the week, for the duration of the military operation.

I had asked Hashem the first night of the operation what tehillim I should say and then opened my tehillim to פג and saw last night this post above


Here is the translation and intro from my Metsudah tehillim
#83 פג

This Psalm is a fervent prayer for God to exterminate the nations who plot the destruction of Israel.  Their intention is not merely to destroy Israel but to obliterate God's Name from the face of the earth.

1. A song. a Pslam of Asaph.
2. God, do not hold your silence; be not silent and be not still Almighty
3. For behold, Your enemies are in an uproar and those who hate You have lifted up their head.
4. Against your people they plot deceitfully, and they conspire against those sheltered by You.
5.  They say "Come, let us cut them off from nationhood, let Israel's name be remembered no more"
6.  For they conspire togethere with a unanimous heart, against you they make a covenant.
7. The tents of Edom and the Ishmaelites; Moab and the Hagrites.
8. Gebal, and Ammon, and Amalek; Philista with the inhabitants of Tyre.
9. Even Assyria is joined with them, they become a supporting arm to the children of Lot, Selah.
10. Do unto them as with Midian; as to Sisera as to Jabin, as the river bed of Kishon.
11. They were destroyed at Ein Dor, they became dung for their soil
12 Make their nobles like Oreb and Zeeb, and like Zebach and Zelmuna, all their princes.
13.  Who said, "Let us inherit for ourselves the pleasant habitations of God"
14. My G-d, make them like whirling chaff, like straw before the wind.
15.  Like fire that burns the forest, and like a flame that ignites the mountains.
16.  So pursue them with Your tempest, and terrify them with Your storm.
17.  Fill their faces with shame, then they will seek Your Name,  Hashem (insert YKVK)
18.  Let them be ashamed and terrified, forever; and let them be humiliated and perish.
19.  Then they will know that You, Whose Name is Hashem (insert YKVK), are alone, the most High
       over all the earth.

Names to daven for immediately!!!! -War Injuries

These were names were just sent to my inbox from my community group in Jerusalem to say tehillim for.  I have no further information at this time.

Shmuel ben Chaya Sarah Yehudis
Mira Rut Bat Chaya Leah
Yosef Yitzchak ben Mira Rut
Chanah Bat Mira Rut
Geulah Bat Mira Rut
Yehudah Chai Ben Chanah

The Kabbalah of Kislev- Rav Dov Bear Pinson Video

This week I (Devora) had the stomach flu while I was home alone with 3 kids and scared that I had to get an I.V in the middle of the night (husband on business).  Besides the physical hishtadlut (effort) of major hydration I also knew that Hashem wanted me to take this opportunity to find him in this place of my darkness.  I closed my eyes and saw and felt Hashem's light, felt some relaxation, and knew that whatever happened I would be guided and taken care of.  As I live in Israel, I always feel that these moments are "practice opportunities" for finding Hashem's light in a situation of war, etc where the opportinuty for a "panic attack" could be much greater.  May we all be blessed to experience Hashem not just through the darkness, but also through the light.  Chodesh tov.  May Am Yisrael be blessed with safety.  May we always turn out eyes to our Avinu Bashamayim

Chodesh Tov!! Guided Imagery for Mar Cheshvan and Insights for the month

Guided Imagery Mar Cheshvan

We are here before you Hashem, vulnerable and open entering the month of Cheshvan after leaving the protection of Your Sukkah and your womb of Elul and Tishrei.  We are apprehensive to fall from the state of connection that we have received over the past months as we enter into the month of Cheshvan with no holidays, and therefore no revealed light of its own.  We are in need of rooting and structure, to nourish and ground the insights and the divine sparks that we had access to during the past few months.  We need to continue to nourish the soil from which we planted new seeds...To maintain the relationship received from your closeness in Elul and your inspiration of your High and Holy days....

As our conception period was in Tishrei, now we are in the period of planting seeds and gestation until another rebirthing in Nissan...Hashem we need to know how to hold you in the dark, unknown months of the year that we are entering.  We need to know how to find you and hold you in those places where there is potential for falling...

Please guide us hashem of how to ground and grow our vessels, our structures even bigger...Please show us how to make them impermeable to the outside influences of all the Yetzer Ha Ra...how to be the perfect vessels for letting in your light Hashem this year.  Please show us how to make ourselves into a miniature Bet Hamikdash....A vessel for your light here on Earth....so that we know even in the dark months we are about to enter that we will be able to experience you and hold the vessel of light for the Beit HaMikdash Hashlishit to emerge in this month

Mar Cheshvan – "And everything is according to the preponderance of action (Rabbi Akiva Pirke Avot)": And everything follows the preponderance of action. Chassidim especially are familiar with the notion that following the holidays of Tishrei, once Cheshvan begins, it is time for action. It is customary for chassidim to spend the month of Tishrei by their Rebbe. At the end of Tishrei and the beginning of Cheshvan, the Lubavitcher Rebbe would send his chassidim off with the verse “And Jacob set on his way…,”7 implying that like Jacob it is time to get to work.  Rabbi Yitzchak Ginzburg

Mar Cheshvan is a relatively quiet month. It comes on the heels of the busiest month, Tishrei. Rav Hirsch relates the name Cheshvan to the verb choshev - to think - teaching that we utilize this month to think about and integrate all that we did, or tried to do, in tefilla (prayer) and avoda (Divine service) during the month of Tishrei. This month is a time of great potential waiting to be actualized. The Mishkan and Bait Hamikdash were completed in this month, but they were dedicated in the month of Nissan. The month of Cheshvan still awaits its turn - to inaugurate the third and final Bait Hamikdash. Cheshvan is empty of holidays, a kind of hollow barrenness that is waiting to be filled. This energy affects us all.  Rebbetzin Silber

The Letter of the Month נ corresponds in the Torah to the image of falling, Nun is a the “prototypical vessel letter” A vessel for receiving.  Final ן - more than any other letter means kingdom and symbolizes Hashem’s Kingdom (dwelling) on earth “G-d will be King over all of the earth, on that day G-d will be one and his name will be one”   
The Hebrew Letters, Channels of Creative Consciousness Rabbi Yitzchak Ginzburg

2,ooo year old baby Judean Palm tree

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=2NY3rG_0tlA

Tikkun for The Subconscious: The Deeper Work in Elul- Rav DovBer Pinson

Tikkun for our Subconscious:The Deeper Work in Elul. Rectifying our Subconscious Through Creative Visualization

Rav DovBer Pinson

The oldest known Kabbalistic text — Sefer Yetzirah — teaches that the month of Elul is connected to the Hebrew letter Yud, the smallest and most fundamental letter in the Aleph Bet. The letter Yud is connected with the Sefira of Chochmah or ‘wisdom’. Chochmah is attributed to the “right” hemisphere of the brain, which is characterized by non-linear thought, creative intuition and imagery (as opposed to language). From this series of correspondences we can see that Elul is a time of ‘making one’s self small’ — like the tiny letter yud — in order to humble the ego and activate some of the deeper, ‘subconscious’ levels of our soul and psyche.
Furthermore, Elul is also associated with “silence”, which is the stillness that comes before Sound. This is significant considering that the Shofar is blown on Rosh HaShannah, the first day of the New Year directly following the final month of Elul. This Shofar blast is considered the ‘first sound’ of the year — the initiatory vibration that gives birth to the next cycle of creation. We learn from this that Elul is thus a time of transition, inward reflection and serious, spiritual work.
Being that it is the last month of the “year”, and being that each step of our journey through the Hebrew calendar is illuminated by a corresponding stage of spiritual development, Elul is recognized as the hardest and deepest stage of the yearly cycle. For as is commonly known the stage of completion, or ‘cleaning up’, is often more difficult and less exciting than the messy and inspired process of creation. It is often easier to start something, than to finish it.
But what exactly is the work of Elul? And what is the proper way to go about doing this work?
To put it simply — the work of Elul begins with us. This presents us with a paradox, being that the self is an entity that is at once both accessible and elusive.
We all have an ‘image’ of ourselves, which — often subconsciously — informs our actions, words and even thoughts.
We often find ourselves doing, saying, or thinking certain things simply because, on a subconscious level, there is this unconscious image ingrained, and these involuntary actions are a result of its influence.
We must therefore delve deeply into the depths of our multi-layered psyche in order to ‘release’ ourselves from the grip of this ‘image’ — the ego — and ‘return’ our center of power to the source of our true being — the Soul or Higher Self. This is the work of Teshuvah, of ‘rectification’ and ‘realignment’ — this is the ‘dirty’ work of Elul.
Throughout this intense and internally directed process we must perform a Cheshbon HaNefesh or ‘Accounting of the Soul’. It is through this meticulous recapitulation of our character traits and behavioral patterns that we attempt to acknowledge all of our mistakes, misdeeds and miscommunications over the course of the previous year and further — to exorcise their negative energetic repercussions. Elul is the time of the cleaning of the slate — where we attempt to ‘balance our karmic check book’.
We must approach this path consciously and compassionately however, for there may often be great inconsistencies between our intellectual knowledge and our actual behavior.
For example, one could have a strong intellectual conviction that lying is harmful to oneself and others. This conviction may be based on an extensive knowledge of Torah teachings concerning the prohibitions against lying, as well years of psychological training in the mechanics of the mind, culminating in a deep understanding of the many reasons why people lie — all to no avail. One’s deeply ingrained, potentially unconscious and emotionally triggered habit of lying could still remain untransformed.
Why?
The answer is that the conscious, or rational, level of the mind is just one level out of many. There are many deeper, less tangible levels of self, which are commonly understood to comprise the ‘subconscious mind’. These unconscious attributes can often over-ride our consciously articulated moral compass and determine our behavior.
To reiterate: When we find ourselves doing, saying, or even thinking something negative, malicious or hurtful, despite our best intentions, it is often because there is a certain ‘self-image’ deeply ingrained in the recesses of our subconscious mind. This may be an unconscious identification pattern which is sometimes formed early in life, or may develop later on as a result of any number of different experiences, traumas or transformations.
When we are in the presence of certain conditions, characters or stimuli, this deeply set self-image can end up ‘taking the reins’ — dictating our actions, words and thoughts, and defying our conscious control. You might tell yourself very strongly to stop doing something, but this may not have a lasting or proven effect when exposed to certain circumstances. Despite all your efforts, when the stimulus returns, you may still involuntarily return to your unconscious reaction or reflex.
This reveals a dis-connect between our conscious, logical and verbal self and our deeper subconscious visual self — a tension between word and image as represented by the right-brain and left-brain modalities.
How can we transform our subconscious mind, if not through intellectual or conscious effort? How do we influence ourselves more deeply than our verbal, or logical left-brain is capable?

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Repetitive Behavior

One approach is the experiential path of repetitive behavior — the path of doing— since habit can become ‘second nature’. It is through this practice of ‘right action’, rather than ‘right intention’ that gives birth to the common conception of Torah’s perspective of ‘deed over creed’. This can be a highly effective technique to alter one’s behavioral patterns on the surface level — from the outside in, so to speak.
But there is another approach, a deeper way that attempts to confront the source of negative character traits and refine them at their root — this is akin to a ‘weeding of our psychological garden’. This path sidesteps our logical, linear left-brain and works directly with the right-brain modality of visualization and imagery.

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Imagination- Cheshek –Desire

The source of all suffering or negativity is Cheshek, ‘desire’ and expectation. Our desires are often fueled by our imaginations. So we can approach Teshuvah — ‘rectification’ or ‘realignment’ — on the level of action, and instead of doing a certain behavior, we can just stop doing it — but that would not be a full Teshuvah. It would not get to the root of the desire, which is lodged in the abyss of un-rectified imagination — the source of our false self-image.
Full Teshuvah would require a transformation of perverse or egocentric Cheshek, into positive Cheshek. This would result in the recognition of all desire being rooted in the desire to re-connect with the Infinite One — with Hashem. We would then be capable of visualizing noble things and imagining goodness, instead of entertaining perverse or demoralizing fantasies based on unconscious conditioning. It is through this ‘rewiring’ of our internal circuitry that we are able to redirect our imaginations and energies from sin to Mitzvah — from depression to exaltation and aliveness.
So how do we “transform” our subconscious? How do we circumvent our logical, linear left-brain, and go deeper in order to affect a more sustainable evolution of our consciousness?

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As stated earlier, repetitive behavior is one way, as habit becomes second-nature. Music, rhythm, chant or repetitive sound and vibration provide another avenue to the seat of the subconscious. And another, highly effective way is through imagery.

The Power of Creative Visualization in Re-Programming the Subconscious

In the West we tend to focus on the ‘word’ and on an intellectual, analytic approach to self-transformation — yet much of who we are is informed not by the word, but by the ‘image’. The Kabbalists teach that redemption begins with redeeming our imagination, our power to dream and create holy imagery.
Rabbi Tzadok of Lublin calls the early period of Jewish History, from Abraham until the destruction of the Second Temple, the ‘action’ period. This period was characterized by the bringing of physical offerings as a way of transforming ourselves and absolving misdeeds.
After the Temple period until today, our main modality has been prayer and study — i.e. text, ‘speech’ and words.
The coming Redemption, however, is connected with the ‘garment’ of ‘thought’ — image and imagination.
Exile is the alienation of the power of dimyon or ‘imagination’. The Seforno writes that fantasy — alienated, ego-centered or false imagination — is the nachash, the ‘snake’. Adam and Chava/Eve were seduced into acting contrary to what they understood to be right or true, because they fell into the quicksand of fantasy and false imagination. They were lured by the snake’s promise to be “like G-d” and began generating grandiose and arrogant visions of themselves.
The Kabbalists teach that the word for ‘snake’, nachash, has the same gematria or ‘numeric equivalent’ as the word for the ‘Messiah’, Mashiach. This is a hint that the ultimate redemption of imagination requires the transformation of the nachash into the Mashiach — turning false fantasy into holy dimyon or ‘imagination’.
The Kuzari teaches that the definition of a chasid is a person that has complete control over their mind. This includes, among other things, the power to visualize events or occurrences clearly, for example — the Giving of the Torah or the Holy Temple (Kuzari, Ma’amar 3, Os 5). A tzadik, says Rabbi Yechezkel Levenstein, is someone who has the ability to visualize holy things in his mind as vividly as if they are real (Sichas Musar, 26).
You may have a negative, subconscious image of who you are or what your abilities may be, that convinces you that you are incapable of living in a functional and fulfilling manner. This image may hold sway over your psyche even though, on a conscious level, you may indeed ‘know’ that you are capable of actualizing your Higher Self. Such a negative self-image can be addressed using various techniques of visualization and rectified imagination.
If you learn to use your chush ha-tziyur — your ‘sense of imagination’ — consciously and creatively, you can access and affect your self and psyche more deeply and directly than conventional study. * Self-transformation is more effective when you can vividly visualize your goal.

Creative Visualization as Taught by the Sages

Rabbi Eliyahu ben Moshe Di Vidas, the great Sixteenth Century moralist and kabbalist, writes in his work Reishis Chochmah that during the daily prayers we should imagine ourselves in The Garden of Eden surrounded by the luminous souls of Tzaddikim or ‘righteous people’. (Shaar ha-Kedushah, Chapter 4). For example, one might imagine oneself davenning in the presence of Abraham, Moshe, Miriam, Channah, Rabbi Akiva, or the Baal Shem Tov — enveloped and intoxicated by the beauty of Paradise.
Reb Elimelech of Lizensk suggested a very deep practice where one visualizes oneself praying in the Beis Hamikdash or ‘Holy Temple’ (No’am Elimelech, Lech Lecha, p. 19). This visualization seems to have been practiced for hundreds of years prior to Reb Elimelech, and there are sources for this practice in both Chassidic and non-Chassidic texts. (Yesod Shoresh ha-Avodah, Shar ha-Korban, p. 82).
The point of this visualization is for one to experience oneself standing in the Temple, or even in the innermost chamber of the Holy of Holies — the most sacred of spaces. This visualization is even deeper than imagining yourself being surrounded by Tzadikim, for here — you are the Tzadik — the holiest person in the world.
Indeed, within our pintele or deepest ‘inner point’, within our shoresh ha-neshamah or ‘root of the soul’, we are all Tzadikim. We are actually in a constant state of unity with the Or Ein Sof, the ‘Infinite Light’.
Rabbi Chaim Vital writes that a person should “turn his attention away from all physicality and conjure up an image of himself ascending into the upper (or inner) worlds”, and that “he should have an intention to receive the light from the source of his soul, from whence his soul comes…” (Shaarei Kedusha, 3:5).
Rabbi Abraham Abulafia speaks about the ‘perfect self’ and the ‘imperfect self’. In reality, we are both. There is a part of us that is always working towards perfection, and there is a part of us that is already, timelessly perfect. Therefore we need to learn, as Rabbi Kalonimus Kalmish of Peasetzna teaches, to imagine ourselves as a true Tzadik and begin to live from that place of perfection (Tzav v’Ziruz, 24, p.340)
In simple terms, just as you used to imagine sin and shortcoming, now you can attempt to ‘reset’ those unconsciously ingrained patterns of your imagination by visualizing goodness and fully actualized potential.
In conclusion, the month of Elul is represented by the zodiac symbol of Besula or Virgo — the Virgin. This energy manifests in two ways. The first is that during the course of Elul, through the gradual and cleansing process of Teshuvah, we attempt to become pure and virgin like. But more importantly, this powerful month reminds us of an indestructible purity that exists within us that is never soiled. There is a part of our soul that remains forever pure, unaffected or unscathed by any external influence. That aspect of our being, although at times obscured or neglected, never goes away — we are always essentially whole.
During the month of Elul, our work is to chip away at our Kelipah or ‘character armor’, so that we can reveal this ever-present purity within.
With Blessings
Rav DovBer Pinson

http://iyyun.com/teachings/tikkun-for-our-subconscious-the-deeper-work-of-elul

*I Devora added the bolding, the Rav had everything that was in italics

A beautiful wedding of 2 holy Jewish neshamot who are wheel chair bound with sever handicaps

In honor of Tu B' Av (a little late as my kids are home and no time to blog).  This video is true Pure Simcha!!!!  Thank you so much to Jewish Mom's blog for posting and translating the Hebrew.  May we all be blessed to have as pure a connection to Hashem as these 2 souls do.

http://jewishmom.com/2012/07/12/the-2-wheelchair-engagement-6-minute-inspirational-video/

Sunrise of Tisha B'Av at the Kotel- We are ready!! :)

The adults are ready too!! :)  Check out this beautiful scene on Tisha B'Av of the Kotel packed.  Baruch Hashem the weather on that day was slightly cloudy for most of the day making fasting much easier

Is It A Transgression To Simply Bypass A Request (Email) To Pray For Others In Need, and How To Properly Refer To One's Parents In A Blessing

http://www.dailyhalacha.com/Display.asp?PageIndex=&ClipID=1449

 I personally just try to stop and say a tehillim for whoever I read about on the spot before any time goes bye as it is easy to forget to add everyone to one's tehillim list.

3d Beit Hamikdash Video trailer

"Respect for Variety vs detecting a valid threat" : Av The Tikkun of Hearing part 2

Excerpt from the 12 Dimensions of Israel Nechama Sarah Nadborny:


     Sorting out both the inner and the outer voices is not always easy.  Truth is a very quiet whisper which sounds forth from the deepest recesses of the soul, beyond the individual, where all souls are linked together.  It is the song of ultimate love and compassion for everyone and everything, even for that which must be destroyed for the sake of the ultimate good....
    When passions for truth are not maturely channeled through a purely altruistic path they can trun into conflict and hatred for another as well as self-hatred.  Similarly, the destruction of both Temples during this month was due to causeless hatred.  Our inherited noble energy backfired.  As a result, we were cast into exile which still engulfs us.  One of the symptoms of the exile is a lack of tolerance and respect for another whose soul was created to reveal divinity in a unique way whether they be from another tribe in Israel or another nation.
   In other words, this causeless hatred is the unrectified passion for justice and truth.  Perhaps we may despise another in our hearts because we feel that their life-expression is not synchronized with our perceptions of Eternity.  This disrespect is a result of our lack of humility and perception that we are all facets of one soul.  We need to fine tune our hearing of the twelve main melodies comprising one grand symphony.  From this point we may discriminate which tunes are purely cacophonous and must therefore be challenged.  
     Because of the dangers of Shimon's temprement, his tribe was particularly assigned to the role of elementary school teachers.  dealing with the unrefined emotions of the child gave the teachers of Shimon perspective on their own passionate tendencies and their negative repercussions.  Thus while being equipped to best understand and relate to the children, he was able to learn form them

Secrets of Redemption Maamar Ha Geulah- Ramchal #4

Excerpts from Secrets of Redemption, Maamar Ha Geulah: Ramchal pages 5,6

"Do not rejoice, you than brings enmity upon me, for although I fell, I rose up; when I dwell in darkness. Hashem is a light unto me' (Michah 7:8)  This verse aknowledges the sod of Yisrael's trust and their yearnings to be redeemed, completely and speedily in our days, Amen."

Rabbi Nissim, the translator and commentor:
     The Ramchal begins by quoting the verse from Micah which encapsulated the entire redemption process.  It refers to the 1st Beis Hamikdash period where Micah predicts the downfall of Yisrael and Yerushalayim, and the subsequent  ascent towards times of peace and global redemption.

This verse is referred to several times in this work.  It describes the two fundamental stages of world development.  The Ramchal calls these stages pekidah and zecihra.  The first part is the process where hashem safeguards us in the Diaspora and is described by the verse, "I fell".  Towards the end of the period of pekidah, the internal perfection of Yisrael will come into effect.  For this reason the verse continues, "I rose up".

The later stage of the Diaspora occurs when society will begin to perceive Hashem.  Initially society is devoid of godliness and empty of spirituality, and therefore this is referred to as darkness, as  ot says "When I dwell in darkness"  However, once society starts to perceive Hashem they will realize that throughout the period of darkness Hashem was maintaining them.  Therefore the verse concludes that "Hashem is a light unto me".  This later stage is called zechira, since it is as if G-d is called into the world by society.  


*I added the bold

Tikkun for Av: The month of sovereignty and humility

From the Twelve dimensions of Israel: Nechama Sarah Nadborny


Attributes for this month:
Tribe:Shimon
letter: tet
sovereignty
humility
left kidney
hearing
Menachem Av (July-August)
Leo
hei-vav-yud-hei

The Risk of Self Expression
     Sometimes we must take the risk and follow the deepest voice that we can hear in order to really be alive, to take the chance and live.  We might later discover that it was yet another sound frequency through which we had to pass in order to arrive at the innermost recesses of the soul.  This process required intense faith and prayer in order to cut through our deep-seated tendency to deprecate ourselves (left kidney) on the one hand, or indiscriminately justify ourselves (right kidney) on the other hand.  This inner journey towards the collective soul, the eternal symphony in the paradoxical harmony with individual existence, must be accompanied by a purification of both of these tendencies.  The grand orchestration of truth and rectification can only be heard if every instrument (need and/or desire) is tuned to reverberate with the whole.

     This is illustrated in the vital role that Shimon plays in securing our sovereignty.  When Yehudah was commanded to go up and conquer the land, he took his brother Shimon with him.  Thus we learn that Shimon is a necessary part of redemption.  The sefira of malchut, soverignty embodied in the land) is a facet of this dimension.  The ultimate claims of personal and national soverighnty require a risk of passionate expression.  However, there is always a  chance that such expression can counteract one's goal.

     Although the Moshiach will come from the tribe of Yehudah, he is born on Tisha B'Av, the month of Shimon.   This also teaches that the quality of Shimon's fiery passion for justice is necessary for the final redemption, both personal and collective...The extent to which our Shimon dimension is pure and balanced, the more we deserved our claim.

*I added the bold

To be continued...  (Respect for Variety vs a valid threat)

Ayala Pamela Bat Leah- You can add yourself to a tehillim list here

http://helppamfightcancer.org/

Young mom of 2 children under 2 in Jerusalem fighting cancer that has spread to liver, breast, spine, and brain

Short Vort: Why we don't greet people and learn Torah on Tisha B'Av?

Secrets of Redemption Book- Maamar Ha Geulah #3- Thoughts on the Beit Hamikdash

**This post is a continuation idea from the commentary on the Chatam Sofer post a couple of days ago, see previous post...


From the translator and commentor Rabbi Mordechai Nissim:
Personal vision
"While we are expected to maintain this tightrope of yearning for the future while remembering our loss, focusing on past tragedy can lead to disenchantment.  Therefore our priority should be to focus on renewal.  After the fall of Yerushalayim and the Beis Ha Mikdash ever generation found itself experiencing spiritual confinement in a foreign environment. It is within this context that the idea of rekindling the Divine spiritual light in this world and, thereby bringing about the ultimate end comes into play.
     Consequently it becomes incumbent upon every individual to create a personal vision of the future, his or her own vision of Yerushalayim.  This is expressed by King David in the verse, "Then our mouths will be filled with joy" (tehillim 126:2)  The Talmud expounds that the joy mention here which in hebrew is s'chok, is only permitted in the future....Like the future state of Yeryushalayim, this joy cannot be expressed now and will not find fullfillment until the future.  We thus find a disparity between the mourning of our loss while at the same time we yearn for the sense of joy.  We visualize our future happiness, even though it is not tangible.  By keeping this mental vision of the future alive we have transcended the limitations of time, no matter what historical epoch we find ourselves in.  The Ramchal explains further that the morner actually becomes like a brand that is connected to it.  Therefore when Yerushalayim is rebuilt, those who have mourned its loss will automatically share in the experience of its rebuilding, since they share its fate. "

**This reminds me of one Tisha BAv when I was at the kotel and it felt so unbelievably peaceful.  There was a lot of "light" and it was packed with people.  It was such a wonderful feeling that it almost felt like one of the 3 regalaim.... how it will be in the future please G-d may we return to the actualization of that quickly.  My other thought is that the first stage one really needs to identify with the pain...What is this place of pain, what is its true source?  How I experience it on a physical level, in my body is one of the deepest places of never ending pain.  It is the pain of potentially loosing one's connection with G-d,- which is in my experience the place of the most "existential/spiritual" pain and therefore for those who can feel its counterpart in the body the most "physical" pain in the world.  However when we feel this, we have a ticket to re connection.  And this can provide what the author states as the "rekindling of the spiritual light in the world".  I was speaking to a friend this week who said "Even though the 3 weeks are hard, when I cry I feel the closest to Hashem right now".  This is the ikkar of the work right now...May we be blessed to feel so united with Hakadosh Baruch Hu during this open window for re-connection!!!

Please Daven for a young mother in Am Yisrael

A young mother with 2 children under the age of 2 with cancer that has spread to breast, spine, liver, and brain.  Please say tehillim for Ayala Pamela bat Leah.  You can also visualize sending her the love and support of the nation, and sending her trust in Hashem our true healer during these difficult times of chemo.  May we hear good new soon for all of Klal Yisrael.  Kol Arevim zeh la zeh.  Keep sending out love to your fellow...we need it right now!

Thoughts on the Yeshiva Draft and the Parshat Matot Maasei- Rabbi Pinchas Winston

http://www.shaarnun.org/ShaarNun_Productions/Perceptions.html

The Rabbi raises important points from both sides that should be deeply considered.  This is not a simple issue.  My 2 cents from the "emunah front" are that we need to put extra focus into our Amidah , especially the brachot.   #1 The brachot about giving us daat.  We can pray for our leaders to receive Hashem's true daat about what to do in this situation.  #2 the bracha about "returning us our judges as in earlier times, and our conselors as at first; removing us from sorrow and groan; and reining over us you Hashem, alone." #3 Of course the one about bringing us your geulah with extra kavannah would not hurt either :)  There is confusion in the land and we really need guidance now more than ever so we can come out with more achdut through following the True will of Hashem ...May we be blessed to have righteous leaders who can hear Hashem's true voice and know how to guide us clearly in Hashem's path for us...

The Chatam Sofer before Tisha B'Av

From Aish.com

Once, on the afternoon before Tisha B'Av, the Chasam Sofer would neither study Torah nor write responsa. He simply closed himself in a room.
One of his disciples, Reb Moshe, could not restrain his curiosity and he quietly opened the door of the room. He saw the Chasam Sofer weeping bitterly over the destruction of the Temple, his tears falling into a glass in front of him.
At the meal before the fast, the Chasam Sofer drank from the tears collected in the glass, in fulfillment of the verse (Psalms 80:6): "You fed them with the bread of tears, and gave them tears to drink in great measure."

We must feel the pain of exile if we have any hope of reversing it. Like orphans who never knew their parents, we risk going about our daily lives insensitive to the lack of a healthy spiritual world. On Tisha B'Av, we strive to understand what the loss of the Temple means - and how we can connect with our destiny, our struggle, our mission and our identity as a people.

When the Jewish People were slaves in Egypt, the redemption did not come about until they cried out to G-d (see Exodus 3:7). So too, the future redemption will follow the same pattern: When the Jewish People cry out to the Almighty, He will hear their cry and redeem them.

The Talmud (Brachot 32b) teaches that when the Temple was destroyed, all the Gates of Heaven were closed - except for one. That is the Gate of Tears. This Tisha B'Av, we must remember that the tears we shed for the destruction are precisely those tears which bring about redemption.

thanks to Rabbi Aryeh Leib Nivin

The Month of Tammuz- Tikkun of Sight part 2

Excerpts from The Twelve Dimensions of Israel, Nechama Sarah Nadborny :

Reuven (from the hebrew root, re'eh, "to see")...or another exposition on the name is Reu Ben ("see the difference " Leah says between my son Reuven and Esav, the brother of Jacob)..

There is one particular incident in which Reuven lacked this ability to accept the reality of the past and the present.  As a result, his emotions caused him to overstep his boundaries as Yaakov's son and to interfere with his fathers household.  After the death of Rachel, Reuven expected Yaakov to move into the tent of his mother, Leah.  Instead Yaakov abided with Bilhah.  Rachels half-sister and maidservant.  The painful realization of the lack of propriety that his mother held in his father's life caused him to react passionately rather than wisely.
       In the terminology of Kabbalah the "son" represents the emotive characteristics of the heart and  the "father" represents wisdom.  The drama between Yaakov and his son Reuven is an archetype of all transgressions which are are a result of human needs, emotions and unrectified behavior suffering from incomplete healing, thereby clouding clarity and dictating our actions.                                                                                                                                                                                               

      However, because of his ability to admit his mistake and take responsibility for his actions he was able to do teshuvah-to take a negative action, a transgression, and elevate it to the point where he could gain the power of insight to go beyond the fragmentation.  We learn in retrospect- only in retrospect that the trangression itself was ultimately a vehicle for bringing us closer to G-d.  After the fact, the transgression provides a unique channel for the light of keter to tap our consciousness.  The entire process of tehuvah beomes an intimate learning experience through which the deepest, most beautiful secrets are revealed.  One acquires an individual teaching: like a direct whisper form G-d whose value exceeds all teachings....

The month of Tammuz- The Tikkun of sight part 1

Excerpts from The Twelve Dimensions of Israel , Nechama Sarah Nadborny

According to the Sefer Yetzira, these aspects are associated with Tammuz

Tribe:Reuven
letter: Chet
severity
awe, fear
right hand
sight
Cancer
hei-vav-hei-yud

Reuven, Reuven can you see now 

That the world is just a mosiac

of His Unity

and a lie is just a reflection

Of the deepest truth

And before you sinned you were already

Forgiven

     Through this dimension we refine the vision of the inner eye of our soul.  Past inappropriate behavior created veils between ourselves and our perceptions of G-d's Unity.  However, once we have chosen to live a more conscious life we are presented with situations that are similar to ones which we have experienced in the past.  A visual symmetry of out inner life begins to unfold a as we are given the opportunity to chose a wiser course of action.
     This entire process begins to expose the transparent rawness of our emotions, which are both part of our instinctive nature and have been molded by past experiences.  Our abberant rawness is rooted in those experiences during which we were not basking in the light of the keter but rather lurking in the shadows of a light yet to be revealed.  As we begin to see through our instinctive responses, our choices become clear.  We may now decide whether or not to struggle with incorporating a higher truth into our present behavior or relax into the familiar.  The correct choice in the present actually serves to elevate the energy expended in the past.  Thus we become part of a process which enables us to reach an even deeper level of insight than the primal state of clear perception.  The initial light of Gan Eden in which Adam and Eve basked, the awesome light, the light of ecstacy and joy, of child innocence is replaced by an even deeper vision of unity that encompasses the paradox of division and oneness.  Our memories create a new symmetry with our present challenges.

Secrets of Redemption Ma'amar Ha Geulah #2

The Ramchal explains:
 "Regarding the (two) Mashiachs, it states, "And the scholars (maskilim) will shine like the radiance of the heavens"  These are the two Mashiachs, according to the sod of netzach and of hod.  "And the teachers of righteousness will be like the stars"  These are the rest of the ministering forces who will arise to guide Yisrael under the Mashiachs.  They will be the stars that receive the light form the sun.
     He the explains in another discourse "Know that when these spiritual light radiate with this beauty and longing, then a great and intense spiritual light is drawn to all of the neshmos of Yisrael.  Amd even if it is not our outwardly manifest, nonetheless, their neshamos receive this spiritual light and it implants within their hearts to return to Hashem their G-d and seek Him out.  Regarding this matter, it is written "When you are in trouble at the end of Days you will return unto hashem your G-d and hearken unto His voice" (Devarim)
     Rabbi Nissim the commentor: The Ramchal is describing how at the End of Days there will be a huge spiritual awakening very similar to the baal teshuva movement we are witnessing in out own days.  Furthermoe, individuals involved in this process are described as "teachers of righteousness"-they share in the job of Mashiach to sheperd Yisrael.  May we have the merit to share in this Divine process, and then the "scholars will shine like the radiance of the heaven"


Lets keep bloggin away and imyirtze Hashem we can be zoche to be some part of this :)

Question from a blogger regarding the source of my letters to the nation with my reply

Question:

AnonymousJuly 9, 2012 11:44 AM

I have a question and I hope you don't take it as criticism. How does a human being of flesh and blood write a letter as if the Boreh Olam Himself is writing it? We have love letters from Hashem in Torah and TaNaCh. Again, I hope I am not hurting your feelings but I have never in my life see a Jew do this.

Answer: I am so happy that you asked this question, as I think that anyone who is reading this post should inquire the source of the information. I realize that you are asking from a place of love and good intentions and it should definitely be clarified publicly.  Just to share a little about myself, I am a Charedi leumi woman who feels very connected to the soul of Am Yisrael.    I write these posts Beezrat Hashem from a place in my Neshama, after morning shacharit (during hitbodedut), where I hear the words within .  I say them in the exact way that I hear them inside.  I do not say that these are the words of Hashem, the title is just a creative expression of what I hear my Neshama saying.  As we are all parts of the collective soul of Am Yisrael, each Neshama is a chelek elokai mimal,  each soul can determine on its own if this resonates as Truth on whatever level for them.  I am a constant seeker of Truth and  Chas VChalilah I would ever put words that did not reflect the ikkar of Tanach to Am Yisrael.  As I have seen so far nothing I have written seems to contradict what I have seen in all of our sources as nothing seems to be "new under the sun".  In addition before I put out the first letter I felt very ill at ease about what I was going to do, though I felt the push inside so overwhelmingly strong , I felt that I did not have the choice but to write what I heard inside(My name is Devora, I  guess that explains it :)  
     As I write the letters I am usually a little bit shaky even during it.  I spent much time trying to get clarity about how to proceed and so  I asked advice from Rav Moshe, a Kabbalist who answers shailot for the Am at the kever of Rebbe Shimon Bar Yochai.  I read him on of the letters, and told him that I do not want people to think I am saying  I am a prophetess or something of the sort (despite the title of the blog I have much fear and trepidation about this).  After he heard  one he just kept say "wow, wow wow", and that the one I had read to him was even reflecting the Torah portion of the week  ".  He said that I have to write them and continue to be a "warrior" for Am Yisrael, especially starting in the month of Tammuz, and that I have a blessing to write them as they come from a place of Yirat Shamayim and from a kol pnimi.  He gave me full blessing to do this and said that I will be needing to write a lot more in the future.  Again please take these words according to your own Truth sensor from your own Neshama...as that is what we have to rely on now in this world until Moshiach Tzidekenu comes and our prophets are brought back to us. 

Letter to my Holy Nation #10

You are My beloved nation.  I have been waiting so long to return to you completely.  Please return to Me as well.  There is no time left.  My love for you is boundless.  Beyond all the seas and the mountains of the entire world.  I wait for you every day.  I have created life for you on Earth to come to know Me forever.  I am rebuilding the Beit Hamikdash now in Shamayim.  You need to get ready to receive it here on Earth.  Your vessel needs to be larger.  Filled with more torah, and mitzvot to receive the holy light I want to shower you with at this moment.  Am Yisrael please do your part.  You are My holy children.  Walk in my ways.  Know that you are chosen to do this important task in the world, and Do it to the best of your ability now.  Don't say "tommorrow I'll make more time to learn, to go to shul, to keep shabbat,"  Start today.  Know that there is One above you always and that this Is the plan for the fixing of all of creation.  Don't be reticent to reach out to Me.  To ask Me for assistance, to talk to Me.  My children where are All of you?  So many more can reach out to Me.  So many bright neshamot that I planted in the world.  Shake the dust off and return to your Abba.      Don't run towards your idols of culture and materialism. Don't feel the need to run and seek pleasure from other sources that are outside(anything material devoid of kedusha)... Run towards me!!  Keep kashrut.  Don't run towards treif restaurants.  Keep your soul pure.  Don't run to seek what others have.  Be happy with your intrinsic holiness that I gave you.  This is your birthright.  Don't tarnish it!! In the end Know that Only your connection to Me will bring you the Truth, happiness, contentment, True love, True peace, and True Freedom that you are seeking.

**If you are seeking practical advice of how to reach these goals, I would love to support B'simcha

Use the 3 weeks to Connect with the Light of the Creator

"We just began a period of three weeks from the 17th of Tammuz (Cancer) until the 9th of Av (Leo). The name came from the verse in Lamentation 1:3, it says “גָּלְתָה יְהוּדָה מֵעֹנִי, וּמֵרֹב עֲבֹדָה–הִיא יָשְׁבָה בַגּוֹיִם, לֹא מָצְאָה מָנוֹחַ; כָּל-רֹדְפֶיהָ הִשִּׂיגוּהָ, בֵּין הַמְּצָרִים”

“Judah is gone into exile because of affliction, and because of great servitude; she dwelleth among the nations, she findeth no rest; all her pursuers overtook her within the straits”

During this time the elements of judgment (Left) are stronger that Chessed (Right). Besides the destruction of the two Holy Temples, the history is full of negative events that happened to the Israelites. The month of Tammuz (Cancer) is full of confusion and doubts in the ways of God. The sin of the Golden calf was in Tammuz and that created a cosmic event that is repeated every year. The main impact is on the level of connection between us and the Light of the Creator. The forces of the negative side with the help of the Erev Rav has greater ability to bring chaos on us.

On the 9th of Av, at the end of the three weeks (21 days), we read the entire book of Lamentation. It is written in special orders of the 22 Hebrew letters to correction and bring the light in order that will shine 7 days after, on the 15th of Av that we know as the day with the highest level of unification between the light and the vessel..

The remedy to overcome the situation of “all her pursuers overtook her within the straits” is a stronger connection to the sources of light that is available to us. We start with the Zohar to help us get charged with the energy of love to each other. Especially during this period we should avoid conflicts because negativity can easily set a burning fire in every situation.

Until the 9th of Av, we should be carefull with every action that we do and avoid judgment as much as you can. Starting new or buying new things may include more of the aspect of judgment so we better avoid purchasing anything unless it is vital to our daily routines, personal or business."

Source Daily Zohar .  ** I added the bolding.  **I realize that this is an "unorthodox" website in its approach to open kabbalah learning for all, and at the same time this really spoke to me

Collective/personal Tikkun and the Beit Hamikdash

  During the omer period as I was trying to internalize the concept of the 2nd Beit Hamikdash being destroyed in connection to Sinat Chinam (baseless hatred), I had a vision of the Beit Hamikdash burning and felt that I was some how a part of this. The part of my collective Neshama which felt the unbelievable pain of Hashem's "abandonment,"(Hashem really just hid his face and withdrew some of his light), intuited that if I am in so much pain, then I must have been a part of the cause (At least as much as I am a collective Neshama of the nation if not more).  I felt that I was also responsible for the fact that the nation was not in alignment with Hashem's will during this period and consequently its destruction.  Therefore I  feel a responsibility on soul level to do Teshuvah.  Without going into gilgulim etc. the sages also explain simply: “Every generation for which the Temple is not rebuilt, is as though the Temple was destroyed for that generation.” 
     I have also felt this similar experience in relation to the Shoah.  After having many bodily experiences over the years where I felt like I must have had a gilgul in the Shoah, instead of staying in a place of victimization, I turned within and tried to look at how I could due teshuvah on the past.  What I witnessed was various memories where I had no knowledge of Hashem during that time period.  I felt very strongly that if I had known Hashem at all and followed his Torah, and listened to his guidance within, my experience may have looked different.  This sparked much Teshuvah/tikkun on both forgiving Hashem, myself, and allowing myself to re-enter into a relationship with Him.

A practical thought for collective teshuvah during this period:

1. To ask Hashem during a period of prayer of meditation to please forgive the part where your Neshama may have had a part in any specific or collective aspect of the destruction of the first or 2nd temple.  (The first temple being connected to horrible idol worship). Then  to say that this should be a full Teshuvah from love, and should be replaced Beezrat Hashem by this current relationship of love, or desire to get closer to Him.   
2. To allow yourself to be forgiven as well and feel Hashem's love (That despite anything that we have done Hashem never "severs the tie" and always loves us.  Remember that the Shechina even went with us straight into the darkness of Galut!!

*Of course these are my own thoughts I have not had the time to research the idea of collective teshuvah in the sources, though I know that there is some concepts that overlap of the Baal Shem Tov.  If someone has some sources, send them my way. Thanks and blessings 

To my Holy nation letter #9

Am Yisrael, the time is closing in fast and the work is great.  Do not close your eyes or be scared, Trust in your Abba Bshamayim.  Know that My deep love for you guides all of your challenges right now.  Know that this is All from Me to get you ready to receive again anew all the light that awaits you.  Don't be scared.  Know that this is all for the Good of the planet.  Do not buckle under the weight being placed upon you.  Search Me out for all of the answers and I will whisper them to you in a still small silent voice.  I will guide you on your path as much as you put all of your reliance and trust in only Me.  Move forward.  Trudge ahead like proud warriors in My army.  Your wholeness is linked to you linking and binding yourself to Me forever.  When you link yourself to Torah and mitzvot, then there is eternal life as the soul never dies.  Do not fear.  No one can bring you into a place of fear under my wings other than yourself.  You are my beloved children.  Where do you find me? Within yourself and within all of creation.  I love you all equally.  Each and every Jew (as well as  goyim who seek me out) has an opportunity to come close to me.  It does not matter what your past was until now.  Just open your hearts and begin to follow my ways.  My Torah and Mitzvot are the bridges that link us together continually.  Every mitzvah adds another reinforcement to this bridge.  Feel me within you and you will not be frightened.

Living with the Creator

In Bilvivavi Miskan Evneh the author states that the goal in life is to feel that the Creator is right near him.  According to the Ramchal this is one of the most difficult levels to achieve.  As the Ramchal says, our senses contradict this truth. (Mesilat yesharim, ch 19).  But when a person gradually accustoms himself to attain it, Hashem will certainly help him until he really feels Him right nearby, and he can talk to his Creator "as one talks to a friend"  This may at first seem beyond a person, but if one accustoms oneself to have all his activities center around Hashem and talks to him throughout the day, it will become much easier.  he will grown in this lofty avodah of feeling that hashem is there and speak to him at all times as if to a friend.  This will become very simple and natural.  This was the way of the great rabbis in all the generations.  they sense a most tangible way that Hashem was present right next to them. 

Here is an inside look at two special Jew's conversations with Hashem.  Blessings to them for posting these internal private experiences for us to have a glimpse into the active workings of hitbodedut. Fields of Judah and A Thunderous Reply

We are one Soul

I am reminded every day as I live my life as a Jew, that every Jewish soul is my soul and that we are in seperable in our mission.  I felt this as I wept after seeing someone who used to be religious without tzizit and kippa anymore.   The feeling I experience is that any Jewish soul's struggles and challenges are my challenges and responsibility as we are" Kol Arevim Zeh La Zeh".  He is part of my soul and I am part of his. The chiddush I took in response to this scenario however, was instead of placing judgment in the world, I davened for him and intuited that he had felt sad and disconnected from Hashem. I try to send him energy that he should feel enveloped in Hashem's light  As our souls are always pure, Beezrat Hashem they will all will be guided to return to their truest soul light.

        Another positive example I had of this was davening at the Kotel this week.  As a woman with small children who does not go to shul all of my davening is not in tzibbur (with the pulic).  Hearing the shalich tzibbu r(the prayer leader) at the Kotel was such a beautful mirroring of my own soul.  This same feeling happened when I listened to the video Tzion (see post below for video), and another occasion on hearing a beautiful chassid singing tehillim with his whole soul out loud one day.  I felt so strongly in all these instances that we are one nation, there is only One Torah, and none of us should ever feel alone in our mission in Am Yisrael.  They are singing and yearning my deepest beliefs from inside of them and I am singing and yearning their deepest beliefs inside of me.  And why does it make me cry because Hashem placed this same exact True Torah and therefore same exact yearning inside all of Am Yisrael!!!  We all feel it because this torah is who we all are.  May we all be blessed to keep elevating each other to our highest potential as Jews.

Secrets of the Redemption- Excerpt from the Book Ma'aamar Ha Geulah from Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzato #1

Important intro from the translator and commentor Rabbi Mordechai Nissim:

While our actions do not compare to the actions of righteous people in earlier generations, we can still contribute to the tapestry of endeavor in the Divine plan.  The challenge is not for history to repeat itself, but for every new moment to bring new light into this world as part of a creative process.  In this work, the Ramchal often expresses the exile as a period in which the Schechina-the Divine Presence-is in exile.  It should be understood that it is not the essence of G-d that is exile since nothing can effect the omnipotence of the Infinite One.  However, it is the holiness and spirituality within physical matter that is in hiding.  The Divine presence is seemingly lost in the secular world.  This further fuels the need to reconnect with the source of light.

     The Supreme Creator has fashioned this unique structure in order to give humans the elements of free choice,so that as the inexorable process of human history unfolds, there are many episodes of darkness, due to man's free will.  Ultimately, however the freedom to choose will culminate in an independence that brings mankind to take responsibility for the universe and to recognize the oneness of existence through technological advances.  This process will lead man to the sole Creator and his Divine plan.  Yerushalayim represents that perfected state, and the individual carries the responsibility to contribute towards this vision of Yerushalayim.  

*As we are getting closer to our Redemption Beezrat Hashem, this work from the Ramchal helps one understand and inkling more of the process.  Im Yirtze Hashem I will post small important sections from this work. I included the bolding, not the author.  

May A Kohen leave Eretz Yisrael? Halacha

http://www.dailyhalacha.com/Display.asp?PageIndex=&ClipID=2343

Parshat Chukat and Techiyat Hametim: Shir by Esther Wein, Rav Moshe Shapiro's Teachings

http://www.torahanytime.com/scripts/media.php?file=media/Mrs/Esther_Wein/2011-06-30/Parshat_Chukat:_Parah_Adumah_and_Techiyat_Hameitim/Mrs__Esther_Wein__Parshat_Chukat:_Parah_Adumah_and_Techiyat_Hameitim__2011-06-30.wmv

To My Holy Nation #8

Am Yisrael,
My beloved nation.  My wells of love for you are so deep- yearning to reunite with you.  Walk with Me as in our bridal days.  Feel the light I am surrounding you with in these times of darkness.  Be humble before Me.  Please do not take My name in vain.  Do not call out to Me only in your time of need and then vanish from Me. My nation, seek Me at all times. Seek Me in all of your ways*.  Know that only I guide your footsteps.  Don't let yourself be trampled by the forces of tumah that are awaiting your vulnerabilities during this time. Bind yourself to Me strongly with all that you have, and fill yourself with Knowledge of My Presence.  Let yourself be humble before Me.  Don't make yourselves into warriors for your own causes that are not with My blessings.  Let yourself be clear of your path through My light.

Practical advice? Let yourself Feel Me.  Let me work through you and be an expression of you to the world always.  Abide by All My Torah, Mitzvot and all the Chukot. Don't think that any mitzvah is less important than another. Love each and every mitzvah the same!!! Don't pick and choose. Know that the secrets of how the mitzvot bring forth their light is very mysterious- beyond human perception. Be patient as Moshiach is waiting in the wings.  Love you fellow Jew as much as you love yourself.  Go out of your comfort zone to do a chesed for another.  Don't be stuck in a life pattern that does not allow growth.  Seek me out.  Talk to Me with every opportunity that you have and through this we will build a relationship of oneness.  From this you will come to experience Me more and come to understand a little more of My manifestation in the physical realm and how I interact with you.  Don't get stuck in the past of what was.  Let yourself move forward in my light.

*בכל לבבך ובכל נפשך ובכל מאודך

Unbelievable emunah, courage, and strength from Eva Sandler

Eva Sandler 3 months after the murder of her husband and two sons in Toulouse, May all the mourners of Zion continue to be comforted http://jewishmom.com/2012/06/27/eva-sandler-3-months-later/  Thank you Jewish mom's blog for posting

Week’s Energy for Parshas Chukas- Rav DovBer Pinson

Re-Entering Life by Rav DovBer Pinson

 In this week’s Torah reading, Miriam and Aaron, sister and brother of Moshe, pass on. The Torah then speaks of the Tuma/impurity of death and the ritual purification of the Parah Adumah/ Red Heifer for those who have come in contact with death.

The Torah reading opens with the words; “Hashem spoke to Moshe… take a perfectly red unblemished heifer… slaughter it… The heifer shall then be burned…Anyone who touches a human corpse shall become impure…(if) he does not purify himself, he has defiled the Temple…Take for that impure person from the ashes of the burnt offering (the red heifer) and it shall be placed in a vessel with spring water…take the hyssop and dip it into the water and sprinkle it on him…”(19:1-18)

This, in short, is the ritual of purifying a person who has become impure through contact with a corpse. There is a sprinkling with a solution of the red heifer ashes and spring water on specific days, followed by immersion in a ritual pool of water.

Tahara/ Purity and Tuma /impurity are intrinsically related to the life/death cycle, and are clearly unrelated to personal hygiene or disease. Tuma is connected to all forms of “death” and the mortality of life, both literally and figuratively. Conversely, Tahara is connected to “life,” both literally and figuratively, and immortal forces of life, such as the Temple and spring water.

Life is movement and possibility. Death is an ‘end’, a state of stagnation.

In death, at least in the physical realm, there is a stopping, a ceasing of hope, a cessation of movement and possibility. To be impure implies a connection with a ‘hopelessness’ consciousness. Purity, on the other hand, is all that is related with life, fluidity and newness, and all that stems from a place of possibility and hope.

The Beis HaMikdash/ Temple functioned as a place ofHischadshus/Renewal. It served as a space in which one could recapture a sense of awe in creation and the Creator. To enter the Temple, one had to be ritually pure, vested with life and possibility.

Every moment in creation is brand new, freshly born, from Ayin/pure potential, no-thing-ness to Yesh/existence.
Each breath, a new Divine enlivening force enters, and is exhaled into creation.

The Temple, being the epicenter of all space, is the place in which this renewal spirit is realized. As a demonstration of this reality, the Showbreads never grew stale, the bread in the temple always tasted completely fresh even if baked a week before.(Chagigah 26b). Everything of the Temple was fresh and new.

The Temple in Jerusalem was built upon the site on which Yaakov/Jacob once slept and dreamed of the ladder and angels. (Bereishis. 28:12-18).When he awoke from this dream, he proclaimed, “Surely Hashem is in this place; and I knew it not.” If Yaakov had been aware of the holiness and purity of the place on which he stood, he would not have been able to sleep. Sleep is a minor form of death, static, stagnant – Yaakov was troubled that he had not tapped into the renewal spirit of the place and was able to go into a space of ‘death.’

Though the ultimate mystery and paradoxical nature of the Red Heifer is beyond our comprehension (Midrash Rabba, 19:3) the specific symbolism is very pronounced. Ashes and water are mixed and sprinkled. When ashes and water mix it creates a form of soap, a cleansing, but there is something deeper occurring. Water is fluidity and life, pure and renewed.

Water is the primordial state of creation, when creation exists in the cosmic womb as pure potential. Ashes represent the end of an old and the potential of a new, the dust returns to dust and thus a new cycle of life begins.

There is Afar/earth and there is Eifar/ dust or ash. (Bereishis, 18:27)Earth represents the Ayin/ no-thing-ness of the Yesh/ existence, as the earth contains the potential of vegetation, yet, Eifer/ash is the deeper Ayin, the Ayin that is relatively beyond Yesh, pure potential. The ritual sprinkling of ash and water reconnects us with the cycle of life and potential of the new.

With all this symbolism and ritual though, it is imperative that we remember, in the words of our Sages “The corpse does not defile, nor does the water purify, rather it is a Mitzvah of the King of Kings.”

Ultimately, it is our connection to Hashem, the source of all Reality, of all Life, the One who brings death to the living and brings the dead to life that offers us renewal, hope and thus Tahara, a fresh breath of life.

 To live in this world is to be touched continuously by both life and death.

All people experience some form of death within their lifetimes, unfortunately it is often tragic and heartbreaking.

Sometimes it is a symbolic death, an ending.

In either sense, death can seem a hopeless ending, a place that is cut off from all possibility of growth.

The energy of the Torah reading this week is the infusion of openness and newness into a place of hopelessness.

Just as ashes return to the earth and begin a life cycle anew, the ashes of the red heifer mix with the water to create a state of purity and life, allowing those who have been in contact with death to find new breath and life in their future.

To move forward from a place of Tuma, we must first immerse in water – fully enveloping ourselves in our primordial state, and reconnecting with the unity of Hashem, source of all – both life and death. From this place of oneness we can find our innate breath and source of life and move forward into life and hope.

This week become aware of how a death, real or symbolic, may be holding you back from life.

This can even be a holding on to a perception, or a way of being, that can be preventing you from growth and forward movement.

Be open to newness of ideas, and new ways of approaching the old ideas.

Come back to your life with an open mind, an open heart and the constant possibility of forward movement.   http://iyyun.com/